Is my partner an alcoholic?You probably came to this website to gather information about whether your drinker is an alcoholic or not. You probably want to find out if he or she fits the medical criteria because that would help your case with getting her to change. You have had the discussion (or should that be argument) many times about whether he is an alcoholic and she has always strenuously denied it. Yeah, we know it's really frustrating, everybody can see it. Everyone except her that is.
What is the criteria for alcoholism?
Alcoholism, or as it is more commonly called these days – dependence – tends to have a number of characteristics
These are the hallmarks of dependency or alcoholism. The problem is that, unless the drinker is actually ready to change then he will predictably tell you “I’m not an alcoholic, I can stop anytime I want”. The problem is that, even if they do say that they are going to change it is seldom today, it is almost always tomorrow or next week. And, if they do stop drinking it seldom lasts.
Does he have a problem
You don’t need a medical diagnosis to tell you that his drinking is a problem. You have asked her repeatedly to not drink too much but it has always fallen on deaf ears. His drinking upsets you and other family members and causes regular arguments in the home. Your social life is shrinking and you are not getting invited to places that you once did, or you are too ashamed to invite people to your house for fear that she might be drunk. Or ... you can add any number of other consequences of his drinking to this list.
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Does knowing whether she is an alcoholic help?
Sorry but the answer to that question is no, it seldom helps. In fact, the word alcoholic can be real barrier to any reasonable discussion. It seems to antagonise and lead to hurt and defensive outbursts instead of moving the drinker towards really looking at her drinking.